24/10


That date marks three things for me. It happens to be Zambia’s independence day, My small mum’s memorial but also happens to be my cheeky young sister’s birthday. That I think is the best part of it and I will talk about that last (always good to end on a high)!

Our independence day for me sort of leaves me feeling a lot of things. While I am glad that we are no longer under British rule, I see things that go on in my country and I’m saddened. What sort of country will my grandkids live in? Is this all we have to offer our kids? Corruption and misplaced priorities? I often ask myself, “what did our forefather’s fight for?” Did they just fight to break the power of one oppressive force to have their children shackled by another? Seeing the state of my country leaves me thirsty for change and hopeful that one day, we will get there. I am reminded of a story I have been told about a man who went to a shop and was told he couldn’t buy the tea pot he wanted because he was black. Only white people were allowed to buy it. He didn’t leave without the teapot.

That man was Zachiluka Phiri, my grandfather. A man who refused to believe he was less of a human being than a white man. I think even that small action was a step in the struggle for liberty; if not for the country then for our family. He was saying to me generations later, years after he died that I was equal to a white man, that the shade of our skin was skin deep. That we were created equal. The fight for freedom from Britain ended 49 years ago for our beloved country but the struggle for liberation hasn’t ended. Corruption holds us down and is choking us. Its time for us to fight so that we can say to our children and theirs after them that they can achieve all that they set their minds to. That when they apply for a job, that they will be picked on merit and on a level platform with everyone and that corruption does not pay!

As for my small mum, she passed away in 2006 a day before I started my grade 12 exams. I generally don’t do well with death, I just crumble to pieces and I remember being unable to stop the tears for days even though I had exams. At school, on the bus, etc. Bana Bwalya was a woman with a lot of fight! She worked hard and she fought for what she was entitled to. You could not defraud her. She also had a sharp tongue and said what she meant! There was never a time when I had to guess where I stood with her. I guess it’s safe to say, she picked her battles and fought them well.

Then there’s my little sister who turns sixteen today. She has my small mum’s sharp tongue and I pray that God will use her to ignite a fire in our family and country that can’t be tamed. A good one that will purify our gold. She is beautiful and intelligent and my prayer is that she sees her worth and sees her gifts and uses them for such a time as this; for our season. I see a fire in the two that have gone before and I see the same fire in her (among others). Yes Mwaba my sweet, you think you know better than me today but I love you all the same and I see you beautiful. here’s to celebrating a beautiful soul. I still remember a little person in nappies 🙂 and can see a beautiful life changer ahead ! Happy birthday my sweet!

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Deadline for the Atlantis Award Extended: November 1st


Calling all poets. Just wanted to share about this poetry competition

the poet's billow

The Atlantis Award is awarded to a single best poem. The winning poet receives $100 and will be featured in an interview on The Poet’s Billow web site. The winning poem will be published and displayed in the Poet’s Billow Literary Art Gallery and nominated for a Pushcart Prize. If the poet qualifies, the poem will also be submitted to The Best New Poets anthology.

Up to five runners-up will be considered for publication and a Pushcart Prize nomination.

Atlantis Award Guidelines 

Read last year’s winners here: 2012 Atlantis

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Still single


People wonder why I’m still single. I’m a 24-year-old who’s never been in a relationship and people are getting worried that if I go passed this age bracket, I might never get married. At different stages of my life, I have had reasons for not being in a relationship. One big one was fear. I was not willing to give a man a chance. Then at one point, I discovered I had my heart set on one man and was unwilling to let go completely. I finally did get close to being in a relationship but his heart was not really in it. I was an option, or at least that was the impression I got.

I had to move on and though there have been offers; not many I might say, I don’t believe in jumping from one relationship to the next, so even though I have never actually dated anyone, it feels right for me that I wait and see where God takes me. Those issues are still there, I guess everyone has their own but I need to work on me and my relationship with God so that when that man finally comes I’ll be ready. I wasn’t anywhere near ready the last time. What does ready look like? “In love with God” is what ready looks like and I am not there yet. I know what I am asking for in a man but I have to be working at being that kind of person. So it’s not a matter of counting works or checking a love metre. When I get to where God wants me before He brings a man, if He has one for me, then a man will be there waiting.

I am single because I am a daughter from a long line of strong men and women; men and women who have shown me to stand strong when I believe in something; women who built legacies alongside their husbands and men who respected their wives and protected them. I refuse to settle for less. If he can’t respect me before he marries me, it won’t matter after.

I am a sister and have younger sisters who need to see that settling is not an option. That there is more to life than a man to buy your Brazilian. That there should be a standard and that it is okay to be alone if God permits (Not yet at that stage). That they are too valuable to settle for a man who only sees their body or a man who is willing to trade them in for pleasure or a man who fills himself with alcohol endlessly or a womaniser. I have seen that too many times; even in my own family. If it did happen that I ended up with a cheat, it should not be because I saw those traits and settled anyway.

I am a mother and I want a man worthy of my daughters affection. The day she was born left no room for men who don’t know what they want. I am too “unstable”! There is no way I am going around adding to my instability by finding myself a man who can’t care for himself. Marriage is not an adoption and I refuse to be a grown man’s mother when I’m called to submit. I want my daughter to see in me, if I do get married, the example that I have seen some before me show. I want my sons and daughters to be blessed by my marriage and not to be maimed by it. I want a man whose example for my sons will leave them loving God, respecting themselves and the women around them; protecting them and not making baby mamas at every corner. I want them to see that I was me and that I was not defined by my singleness or my being coupled. That in whatever state I was in I lived. That I refused to be pushed in a corner and settle for just anyone. That while time waits for no one, focusing on the man I don’t have is daylight robbery. I refuse to let others make choices for me and that the responsibility for the consequences is mine.

I am more than a couple, more than a single woman, I am more than my feelings more than my aging ovaries. I do want to get married but not out of fear of dying alone, yes I am sometimes scared but this is the season of my life and I will live my life as it comes. Along with these things, I want my example to be that I did not sit around and wait for a man but that I lived for God and that nothing held me back. I want to move from where I am and to grow in each season, counting my blessings and not looking at what I don’t have.

Democracy at work


I am not one for giving opinions on other people’s “homes” and I don’t quite appreciate it when other people comment on my home when they have no clue what is actually happening. When it comes to the US government shut down I have heard opinions ranging from the Republicans are just racist and are doing “this” to get the black president out of office, right down to, Obama is stubborn and refuses to negotiate. I will not comment on the ins and outs of what is going on because I am not an American and we will leave that for them to do.

For someone like me who comes from “third world’ country, living in a Western Country, AKA Australia, it looks really bad for America because while we don’t understand completely what’s happening, it looks like a bunch of grown men refusing to compromise and find a working solution. A lot like a Country who is up in everyone’s business, but can’t even run their own Affairs. Constantly deciding what’s best for us Africans yet you can’t even decide on how to fund your own government. That’s how bad it looks and it will take a lot to build credibility.

On the flip side though, it goes to show that man can not be trusted. So many of us look to government to solve our problems, yet this shows us that the people we elect to lead us are just humans, who may or may not represent our best interests and at the end, each community has to find what works best for them. I guess it’s also a good thing that the President doesn’t have all the power. He can’t just act as he wills. Those are safeguards that my country only dreams of. All we can do is pray that everything works out okay